Is There a Time to Quit?

We have tried very hard to instill the importance of perseverance in our boys. The rule typically has been that if you start something, you have to complete it. That means if you start a season of ball, you can’t quit until the end of the season. If you get a job, you stick with it for at least six months.

There have, of course, been exceptions. When my youngest was four we signed him up for baseball. When we discovered that all he wanted to do was sit on the trashcan in the dugout and sing “Who let the dogs out? Woof, woof, woof,” we let him quit. Of course, we also didn’t let him collect the trophy that the Rec Department still awarded in his name. No play, no reward.

In sixth grade, when he wanted to try public school, we finally relented and gave it a try. After three weeks of misery for him and us, we finally called it quits and let him come back home. You live and you learn.

There have been other times as well and with other sons too. Sometimes we have made them stick it out, and sometimes we let them quit. It’s not always easy to decide which is the better of the two options.

Today, I quit a job—after only two weeks. I have very mixed feelings. It’s not the first time I’ve ever quit, but it’s the first time I quit after only two weeks, without another offer on the table.  

While I believe that my reasoning was very sound, there is still a part of me that kind of feels like a flop. Honestly, it kind of makes me feel like a loser. It was an unanticipated move. If you asked me this morning, I would have told you that I would be there for at least six months. That’s kind of the “rule” for us.

I didn’t react. I didn’t act out of anger or some strong emotion. The circumstances of my job just changed, and I realized that it wasn’t what I had hoped it would be. It wasn’t what I am good at or even comfortable with, and, so, I quit.

Before I even pulled out of the drive, I called Ian. He was supportive, but still I felt pretty crummy. After all, he has gone and continues to go into work every day, working long, hard hours in order to provide for our family. But, I couldn’t even stick with a job for more than two weeks? Uugh! I also thought about the boys as I drove home. I would have to go in and tell them that I quit when I have told them so many times that they couldn’t. I was surprised to find that they were very understanding as well.   

In The Best Yes, author Lysa Terkeurst writes, “The decisions you make determine the schedule you keep. The schedule you keep determines the life you live. And how you live your life determines how you spend your soul.”  She also writes, “Our decisions aren’t just isolated choices. Our decisions point our lives in the directions we’re about to head. Show me a decision and I’ll show you a direction.”

This job didn’t point me in the direction of my dreams. It didn’t even utilize my strongest talents. I know it wouldn’t have made me happy.

So, was it OK to quit?

I guess so. I am blessed to have a husband who provides, blessed that I didn’t rely on this job to pay the bills, blessed that there are (hopefully) other opportunities out there for me to contribute to our family’s income.

There is a time to say “yes,” and there is a time to say “no.” I’m still not sure how I feel about it, but today was my time to say, “no.”

What about you? When do you find it hard to say “no”? Why?